Repost: Keeping our children safe in the face of violence

I've contributed to the Orlando Sentinel's Moms at Work blog since 2010. The blog is changing content management systems and my old posts will no longer be available to the public, so I'm reposting them here, in the order that they were originally posted.





March 13, 2013






All children deserve to be safe, and well-fed and cared for by the people who love them.

Can we all agree on that?

Jonylah Watkins, whose story is posted above, was fed and cared for -- but she wasn't safe. She died this past weekend after she was shot as her father changed her diaper. She was hit by five bullets. Her father, who was injured in the shooting, had no chance to fight back and/or protect himself or his child in that moment. Jonylah was just six months old. To make matters worse, the incident that took her life wasn't the first time her physical environment had been shattered by gunshots; CNN reported that Jonylah's mother sustained a bullet wound to the leg while she was pregnant with the girl.

Stories like this make me feel so sad. Not just for Jonylah's family -- although I can't imagine the grief they feel right now -- but also for her community and the country in which I live. This should never happen. No parent should have to bury a child because of violence or matter-of-factly accept that violence is probable or possible for children who aren't old enough to drive or sign legal contracts. Not in Jonylah's neighborhood, not in anybody else's. Whose fault is it that the girl is dead? That's hard to say.

Repost: Coming to grips with Sandy Hook

I've contributed to the Orlando Sentinel's Moms at Work blog since 2010. The blog is changing content management systems and my old posts will no longer be available to the public, so I'm reposting them here, in the order that they were originally posted.


Dec. 19, 2012

So what do we do now?

After the funerals, the post-mortem psychoanalysis of the Sandy Hook killer and the debates about mental illness and gun control, what can concerned parents do next?

My guess? The best thing those of us who are not directly touched by last Friday's horrible incident can do is to go on with our lives. That's not to say that we should be unaffected by what happened at Sandy Hook Elementary; I think anyone would have to be made of stone not to feel a lump in his or her throat when hearing or reading about what is most parents' worst nightmare.

However, this is not a time to make drastic changes in a family environment or schedule, nor is it a time to revive the tired old mommy wars in a not-so-subtle attempt to slam working parents.

We should continue to reassure our children and answer their questions about the massacre in an age-appropriate way, to the best of our abilities. We should even talk with them about death, and what it means and is and isn't.



And while it's certainly a time to be vigilant and encourage our children to be watchful of their surroundings, it might be going a step too far to surreptitiously profile people who seem as though they might match the profile of mass shooting killers.

As difficult as it seems, this is definitely a time for parents to keep our wits about us and try to keep to our regular routines. I doubt that a few extra hugs and cuddles will hurt anybody or anything, though.

I quite literally shudder when I think about the terror felt by the children at Sandy Hook Elementary School. I'm terribly sad for those lost, those who experienced or heard the horror as it happened, the parents of the school's children and the entire community.

How are you and your family handling the aftermath of this terrible event?